In July of 2021, while I was 8 months pregnant, my husband and I accepted a six-week-old little boy into our home through foster care.  We brought him home from the NICU and were immediately entranced by his smile, his coos, his hair – he was the perfect little boy.  I mean, look at that face!

I don’t think we truly knew what we were doing when we brought our son home, but I knew one thing – he was ours, and I would fight for his well-being as long as I was able.  I would fight for him to be in a home where he was loved, where he was chosen, where he was cherished.  All I wanted to do was to protect this little boy from all of the pain he’d already been exposed to, from all of the loss he’d already experienced – I just wanted to love him. 

Six weeks after we brought my son home, we brought my daughter home from the hospital.  We now had two infants – 3 months apart in age – and I honestly wouldn’t have changed a thing.  One took bottles, the other was breastfed.  One loved to be held, the other preferred to explore on the floor.  One liked to be swaddled, the other hated it.  They are two very different kids, but they are also the happiest, sweetest, kindest kids I could ever have asked for.  They get along and enjoy playing with each other.  

Neither my son nor my daughter will remember the first two and half years of their lives – time in which we wondered where our son was going to end up, if we were going to be able to adopt him.  Every court date made me an anxious mess, wondering if his birth parents would show up or if they would have things together enough to take care of him.  When we finally got termination of parental rights from the court, I cried in relief. 

Adoption doesn’t come without loss.  He has lost his birth family and the connection with that part of his heritage.  But we have gained so much from having him in our family.  His laughter, his love, his energy – our home would not be full without it.  His sister will never know life without him.  He will never know life without her.  They will continue to grow up together under our roof – forever family. 

Foster care and the process of adoption were certainly not easy (neither was pregnancy or childbirth!), but they were things I would do again to have my two kids – both of them.  In this season of Thanksgiving and Christmas I am grateful for my forever family, my son, Jaxson, my daughter, Alyson, and my husband, Cody.  I hope my kids grow up knowing that no matter what biology says, they are family – forever. 

This post originally appeared on the Breathing Room Blog.