The goodbyes have started.  And this time, I can’t say, “Have a great summer!  I’ll see you in the fall!”  This time, there is no denying that this is goodbye.  

I will miss much, from the choir, praise team, and college ministry and so many others at NSCBC to the life-long friends I’ve made at Gordon, to the coaches I’ve worked with and the kids that I’ve taught, to the departments who have become like family and the underclassmen I can’t wait to see succeed.  

In talking to many people this week, it seems that it’s hard for me to leave because I’m so invested here.  In my church, in my jobs, in my department: I didn’t just sit idly by and let life pass me by.  I got involved.  And I invested.  And that makes it harder to leave.  But, it means that I did something in these last few years and that I’ve grown and matured and changed and loved and lived and hurt and fell and got back up again.  It means that I cared about people and people cared about me.  

This was the place where I opened up and told people my story.  And these are the people that have helped me to see that God has given me a powerful testimony to use for His glory.  This was the place where I saw God work through a church body and these are the people through whom I was finally able to see myself the way God sees me: beautiful.  

I’ve struggled for a long time with feelings of not being good enough, not skinny enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, not healthy enough, just plain not enough.  This isn’t a fix all, I will still struggle with this for the rest of my life.  But, I’m starting to see glimpses of how God sees me.  Through people, through music, I have been shown that God doesn’t need whole, perfect people.  In fact, He prefers broken jars of clay through whom to do His work.  And to him, those broken pieces are beautiful.  

Just as I am, you are a beautiful piece of pottery that God has molded and shaped to this very day for His will.  He has placed you here to do His will, and to flourish.  If you’re in a place of trial, take hope that the same God who brought you in will bring you out.  If you’re in a place of transition, take hope that God has a plan for you, even if you can’t see it.  If you’re unsure of what’s going to happen next, take hope in the unchanging, all-powerful, immortal God who will stand by you no matter what.  

“Until then, may we face each struggle with the hope that he is working out his salvation in us, looking to the day when all things will be made new and suffering ends.” – Choosing to See, Mary beth Chapman