Category Archives: Uncategorized

Scars

By Kristen Mudrack

I spent the last two weeks roaming around Colorado and Utah seeing God’s beautiful creation firsthand with a college trip. How amazing to drive through the San Juan mountains or how speechless to stand at the foot of a mountain of sand. How breathtaking the beauty of the view at Pikes Peak. How wonderful the sunsets and sunrises and the rain and – yes, even the snow.

The view from Pikes Peak at 14,000 feet, Colorado

Remember those sand dunes? And the mountains? They were formed by violent winds and plates shifting. Those things at we call beautiful were brought about by something devastating and powerful. If you will, think of those mountains and dunes and valleys and lakes as scars. They are the scars of what has happened in the past. And yet, they are beautiful.

Canyonlands National Park, Utah

We tend to look at scars differently. We see scars on our bodies and remember the awesome stories or the way that we injured ourselves. Scars on our hearts are a little bit less glamorous, though. When parents walk away, friends die, relationships end, someone hurts you – those stories aren’t usually the ones we tell. Those scars aren’t the ones we proudly show off. We tend to hide them. Bury them. Run away from them.

Just a few weeks ago, we celebrated Easter. You probably went to church and sang songs about Jesus’ resurrection and heard sermons that were really aimed towards all of the visitors that day. You probably responded to the pastor’s call of “He is risen!”, with “He is risen indeed.” But for all of that celebrating, how many of us remember the scars?

You’ve probably heard the story of Jesus appearing to doubting Thomas before. It’s nothing new. But look at what Jesus says. He says, “See my scars. Touch my wounds and believe.” The thing that Jesus presents to Thomas so that he will believe are his scars. The very same things that freed us from the bondage of sin, that we sing bout, that we call beautiful, are his scars. His scars were the proof. The thing that tore the veil and made a way for us to know him,the thing that makes him our savior,those were scars.

What if our scars should do the same thing? Help people believe?

What if, instead of hiding or pushing down our scars, we let God use them to ring people to him? To help them believe?

Arches National Park, Utah

I used to hide behind my scars. The ones that only I could see. And then one day, God dragged me kicking and screaming out of my comfort zone and showed me why I had those scars – for his glory.

When I finally let God use my scars for his glory, I saw a glimpse of what God sees: beautiful scars. Scars that point to him, that tell of who he is. I still have a hard time seeing my scars, let alone myself, that way. But God is using other people’s scars to show me his heart. He’s even using the scars on the earth that I’ve seen these two weeks to remind me of his glory, his majesty, and his beautiful scars.

Canyonlands National Park, Utah

So what story do your scars tell?

Thoughts on Proficiency in Christians

When someone says the word “worship”, most people will immediately think of music. Music is an integral part of the Christian Church’s worship, and it shouldn’t be surprising that philosophies on how music should be conducted has changed and developed over the ages. There are many, many different ways that various churches, even within a single religion, go about worship. You can visit this website to read about various styles of Christian worship.

One thing that I find interesting is that in the early Medieval church, the monks completely ruled out anything that was pagan, this included instruments; they thought that instrumentation took attention away from the words. The music was monophonic, meaning that there was only melody, no harmonies, and they kept the notes very simple. But even this changed as ways of writing music down began to be developed, and harmonies and pedal tones were added.

One thing I love seeing is someone who is proficient in their craft. A person who is a great musician, or who is a wonderful woodworker, or a writer whose writings seem so real that you actually feel like you personally know the characters. This is where I disagree with the monks on their philosophy. Being a lead guitar player, this will be biased, but I feel that people should be allowed to use their talents for the glory of God, and this includes playing proficiently in worship (side note for fellow lead players: being musicality proficient doesn’t mean cramming as many notes into a solo as you possibly can; musicality is key).

I know people disagree with me on this and will say that worship is all about the words and what they are trying to communicate and that the music should only be for backing the vocals, and I do agree that in a church environment the words should shine. But I also feel that the music is important. What better way to worship God than to nurture your talents to the best they can be. When I play a guitar solo in church I’m not trying to get people to notice how good I am. I’m using that time to use my God-given talent to worship God through my guitar. When I’m worshipping alongside a worship band and they have an instrumental section I don’t think to myself, “what attention hogs! That had nothing to do with God”, rather, I am encouraged that they were willing to put in the time and effort to nurture their God given talents to facilitate worship.   

I use playing guitar as an example because that’s how I worship, but this certainly could be applied to other places. Whether you are the church’s groundskeeper, a librarian, or you work in a fiberglass factory, you have the opportunity to worship God by doing what you do to the best of your ability.

Seeking Joy

The first Bible study I wrote that I let other people read was for my women’s small group several years ago.  I was hesitant to let other people read what I had written for fear it was wrong or not good enough or downright boring.  I emailed out the week’s devotional Bible study and didn’t really get much of a response from my ladies – it was summer, after all.

But one day, one of the ladies, a friend of mine, was talking to me about it at a baby shower.  “It’s been so good,” she said, “to stay in the Word, and to learn more about the Fruit of the Spirit.  Where did you get these devotionals from?”

“Well,” I replied, “I wrote them.  I’ve studied some commentaries and some of the things others have written, but mostly I’ve studied the Bible, the actual text.”

“Seriously?” she exclaimed.  “You should publish that.”

It took one of my other friends to push me to write the study in the first place, and now it was another friend who was encouraging me to publish it.  It took a few years for me to finally break down and do what they suggested, but I did.  Since then, I’ve written a couple more studies, one of which I published just this summer.

I tell you all of this to say that I don’t write studies just to write them, I don’t write them to make money, and I don’t write whatever I feel like.  Each study I’ve written has come out of a need I see around me.  If God hasn’t stirred a need in my heart, I wait until He does.

This summer, I have been encouraged by conversations with many women about the need for joy.  The need to find joy in all circumstances and places.  And this is something that has been on my heart as well.  As I begin this journey into writing this new study on Joy, would you pray with me that God will reveal to me what we need to hear?  Not what is easy, but what we need.  Would you pray with me that He would bring revelation and understanding as I study the Scriptures and bring the words to you?

Thank you for your prayers, and may God grant us His truth as we seek joy.

Quiet

It’s quiet right now, except for the sound of the rain outside, falling down the roof onto the concrete on the front porch.

Quiet isn’t something most of us are used to.

We don’t like the quiet because we start thinking when it’s quiet.  So we turn on the TV for some “background noise” or the Pandora station for some worship music.  We fill our time and our space with noise so that we don’t have to think about the things that come to us in the quiet.

The fears.

The insecurities.

The lies of the devil.

As I look around me, I see things on my walls.  Pictures of friends and family, photos from our wedding, verses, mementos from China…and all of it reminds me that even in the quiet, I am not alone.  Even when the fears and insecurities start creeping back into my mind, I don’t have to face them alone.  God is in the quiet.

God is also in the noise, too, but right now especially, I hear God in the quiet.  I hear Him remind me that I am His child.  I am loved.  I am His.  That He has his hand on my life, my marriage, my family.  He is working.  He is moving.  He is God.

In the quiet, I listen.  In the quiet, I pray.  In the quiet, God speaks.

Lord, give me ears to listen, eyes to see, and a heart to do what you are speaking.

Friends

A few weeks ago, my husband and I traveled to Michigan to visit some friends that I had while in graduate school there.  The five of us have studied the Bible together, helped pull of church functions together, watched each others kids grow up, and have lived life together.  They were my community, and it broke my heart to leave them two years ago.

But two years have passed, and now there are more kids in the picture for many of these families – kids who don’t really know me as babysitter, friend, or adopted aunt.  That doesn’t prevent me from getting on the ground and playing with them, though, and loving them in the time I have with them.

In those two years, much has changed in my life, including another move to Tennessee and marrying my wonderful husband.  I’ve gotten to introduce my husband to these friends, and they have become his friends, too.  I love getting to share life with my husband – the good, the bad, and the ugly – and getting to share people who have shaped my life with him, too.

It was such a joy to see my friends and their families, to see how the kids have grown, and to meet the new ones who have come since I have been away.  It was wonderful to talk to them about marriage and life and kids and God, and to share in their lives for even a little bit of time.  These people mean so much to me, and I am ever so grateful for them.  May the Lord continue to bless you all and bring you closer to Him daily, and may you be friends who commune with the Lord and each other in the ups and downs of this life.

All my love to you and your families,

Kristen

The Hall of Mustard Seed Faith: Now Available!

If you hadn’t heard yet, one of the things that I worked on this summer was to finally edit and publish the study I wrote on Hebrews 11.  It’s now available on Amazon in both print and Kindle editions, which you can find here.

I’m not one for promoting myself or the material I write, but if you’ve found this book (or the PDFs I posted on this site) helpful or encouraging in any way, would you mind leaving me a review on Amazon?  Thanks so much!

Live Differently

How do I make sense of it?  How do I accept that life can be cut off so abruptly – by a gun, by a car crash, by cancer, by any number of things?

Doctors likes to assure us that our life expectancies are high, that we’ve got time, that we’ll live to see our grandkids.  That we have time to decide what we really want to be when we grow up.  That we have time to grow up.

Do we?  Do we have time to put things off until tomorrow, or wait to say something until the next time we see that person?  Do we really have time?

Somehow, we’ve been conditioned to live like tomorrow is guaranteed.

But it’s not.  We are not promised tomorrow.

Living like tomorrow is promised means that we don’t always say “I love you.”  We don’t always resolve our disagreements quickly.  We procrastinate. We don’t visit family or friends when we can.  We don’t stop and smell the roses.  We don’t enjoy each moment we have.

Just because we aren’t guaranteed tomorrow doesn’t mean we don’t plan for the future, invest smartly, save for retirement, or try to do everything today.  We still have to have a long-term goal in place.  But it does mean that we live differently.

Living differently means taking every chance you get.  It means saying, “I love you” every morning before you leave for work.  It means taking the time to talk to those around you and offer your shoulder to cry on, even when there are tests that need to be graded.  It means giving your kids more time to crawl on top of you and tickle you.  It means living each day as if it was your last.

Tomorrow is not promised.  It’s a gift.  When you unwrap that gift every morning, give thanks.  And then go live it to the glory of God the Father.

Pray For Someone

It was a warm, summer evening many years ago when I first went to a live Casting Crowns concert.  I had been listening to their music for years, but had never seen them live.  I was so excited – but I had no idea what was in store for me, or what this concert would begin.

My family set up our lawn chairs at the outdoor venue and waited expectantly to hear my favorite Christian group perform.  And yet, from the first note they struck, it wasn’t a performance – it was worship.

They were leading worship.

Somehow, the stage wasn’t about them.  It was about pointing the crowd to God.  At one point near the end of their set, Mark Hall began singing the worship song We Fall Down.  He asked that we lay all of our burdens down at the feet of Jesus, and that we lift up someone up in prayer that they would do the same.  At that point, I felt moved to walk around a couple of chairs to my younger brother and to lay my hand on him and pray for him, that he would surrender all of his life to the Lord and His leading.

I didn’t think about that concert again until a few years ago, when my brother and I were at another Casting Crowns concert.  He leaned over to me and asked, “Do you remember our first Casting Crowns concert?”

“Vaguely,” I replied.  “It was at Alive, and our whole family was there.”

“And you prayed for me,” he added.

I hadn’t even remembered that until he brought it up again, but that prayer made an impact on him.  He remembers it.  He remembers that his big sister prayed specifically for him.  He remembers more of what I said than I do.  But my measly little prayer that day did more than I ever could have imagined.  We’ve been to many Casting Crowns concerts together since, but none sticks in his head so much as that one.

Pray for someone with them today.  Not just in private.  In person.  Out loud.  And ask the Spirit to lead you.  You never know what God might do with it.

Picture Perfect

By Kristen Mudrack

I’m not a huge fan of pictures of myself.  I tend to want to be the one holding the camera instead of on the other side of it.

You see, I tend to not like the way I look in pictures.  The picture was too posed, or the light wasn’t right, or I look fat, or I’m not smiling, or any other such excuse I can come up with.  But usually it’s because I don’t like the way I look.

I have this image in my head of what I should look like.  In short, perfect.  I should look put together, happy, and healthy, even if that’s not actually true at that moment.  I think I got this notion from looking at social media – where we all put the best of ourselves out there.  The perfect selfies and the happy status updates – they don’t always reflect real life.  When did we become so good at pretending?

Pretending that everything is okay, even when it’s falling apart.

Pretending that we’re always happy, even when we’re struggling.

Pretending that we’re always healthy and flourishing, even when that is the furthest thing from the truth.

In social media today, we put forward the best of ourselves.  We want people to see the best image of us, not the struggling, frazzled, often overextended person that we actually are.  Now, there are things you shouldn’t share on social media.  For example, that you’re angry with your significant other or a confidential matter that has been shared with you.  But neither should we always be the perfect version of ourselves.

Pictures show that more than anything.  I have pictures from college during times that I was on steroids and sicker than ever before.  I can tell, in those pictures, that I wasn’t feeling like myself.  I have pictures from trips with my family and friends that show beautiful landscapes but also dirty, muddy, sweaty, happy faces.  I have pictures from my wedding that show unbridled happiness as never before.

The more I stand on this side of the camera, the more I realize that I love these pictures.  Even the ones where I look terrible.  Because they show the real me.  The messy, dirty, imperfect, happy, sad, healthy, sick, real me.

What do your pictures show?  Do they show the real you?  Or the you that poses for the camera?

Empty

I’ve been searching for inspiration all day.  Something to write about.  And I’ve come up empty.

Although, I guess that is something.

How often do we search and search and search for something, and even when we think we find it, still feel somehow…lacking?  It’s maddening to many people when they try and try to find fulfillment in movies or in fame, in success or in their kids, in how high they can climb at work or how much money they can save.  But none of those things will satisfy us.  None of that will ultimately fill the void in our lives that only Christ can fill.

We search for that fulfillment in so many ways, every day.  And we search for it in good places.  We want to be fulfilled in our marriages, in our families, in our work.  We are honestly working for good things.  But it’s not enough.

We can strive and strive and strive to be the best wife possible, the best sister imaginable, the best ministry leader that we can – but without God, it is nothing.  Without Christ at the center, it is meaningless.

So I guess that’s my challenge for me and for you today.  Go to God.  Sit at His feet and lay your burdens on Him.  He can handle it, I promise.  Ask Him to fill the void in your life, the places where you feel empty and inadequate, and watch Him work.  And then go do what He’s calling you to do – be a wife, a mom, a friend, a teacher, a sister, a daughter.  Get up and go, having been fulfilled by the only one that can do so.