All posts by K. Entwistle

Immeasurably More

By Kristen Entwistle

I was cleaning out my desk the other day and found something pretty amazing: God’s provision.

I’m packing up my apartment to move a few hours away, and so, naturally, I was cleaning out my desk – you know, throwing away old papers that I really shouldn’t have kept in the first place, getting rid of the things that I just threw in the drawer over the last four years…and I came across some old cards.

I tend to keep things…probably longer than I should. But be that as it may, I’m glad that I kept these.  They’re cards from very dear friends that were written as I was graduating college and moving to Michigan.  I opened them up and started reading them…smiling at the memories and laughing at the inside jokes from long ago.

And as I opened each card, the same thing kept staring me in the face.  Each of these people who were so dear to me had written similar things, among the jokes and stories and laughs.  Each of them had said that they were praying I would find a good, Godly church in Michigan.  That God would bring me good friends at all of the right turns in my life.  That God would provide.

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And He has provided – all of those things.  More than I could ever have imagined.

He brought me to a church, where I have been able to serve and love and grow, where I have been blessed with a family of God that is so dear to me.  It’s been a place where I have seen the kids I watch grow up and change and learn.  Where a Sunday doesn’t go by that I don’t get a hug from at least one of my little ones, brightening even the darkest week.  Where I have been encouraged to lead and to write and to serve.  Where I have been loved.  Where I have walked life with some amazing people – the hard times and the good times.

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God has not only brought me good friends – He has brought me great ones.  Friends that I am going to miss terribly, but who will remain friends for the rest of my life.  Friends who challenge me, encourage me – friends who have changed me for the better.  Friends who let me love their kids – and who love me.  Friends who share life with me – and I with them.  Friends who pray with me and for me and let me pray for them.  Friends who have shown me the love of Christ.

When I read those cards four years ago for the first time, I trusted that God would provide through the prayers of my friends.  But I didn’t know until now, reading them again, just how much He has provided.  So if you’re wondering if God is good – let me remind you.  He is.  If you’re doubting that He can provide what it is you need – let me remind you.  He can, and He will.  If you’re in the middle of a trying season, and you’re hanging on for dear life – let me encourage you.  He’s got you.  He’s not gonna let go.  He will provide – and He will do immeasurably more than you could ever ask or imagine.

Tell Your Heart To Beat Again

By Kristen Entwistle

I rarely hear a new song on the Christian radio station that I listen to in the car.  It’s not that there aren’t new songs, but that there’s a pretty solid playlist that they cycle through.  But yesterday, I heard a new song – at least, new to me.

I don’t think I’m the only one who has been through difficult circumstances or been disappointed by life’s waves.  When things are going well and you get blindsided – by unforseen heartbreak, an unexpected diagnosis, the death of a loved one, the loss of an unborn child, rejection from a potential job, personal rejection by a friend – the list could go on and on.

When life’s waves hit me and knock me over, it’s just not that simple – to tell my heart to beat again.  But what I love is that this song doesn’t say is that I have to tell my heart to beat again right now.  Healing takes time.  But healing also takes a beating heart.

Let every heartbreak
And every scar
Be a picture that reminds you
Who has carried you this far
‘Cause love sees farther than you ever could
In this moment heaven’s working
Everything for your good

Tell your heart to beat again
Close your eyes and breathe it in
Let the shadows fall away
Step into the light of grace
Yesterday’s a closing door
You don’t live there anymore
Say goodbye to where you’ve been
And tell your heart to beat again

I’m Not Normal

I’m not the girl who turns heads on the street.  I don’t have the perfect body or the right hair or the right makeup or even the right clothes.  You’ll never find me on the cover of a magazine or even in an advertisement on page 73.  You won’t ever see my name in lights outside a theater or hear me sing to an audience of a thousand.  You’ll never turn on the radio and hear my songs or see my books on the bestseller list.

Sometimes I wish for those things – to be prettier, skinnier, more outgoing, to have the chance to know what it feels like to be a bestselling author or a famous singer.

But most of the time I just wish I was normal. 

If I were normal, I wouldn’t have to carry two dozen medications and four medical devices through airport security.  I wouldn’t have to get up an hour earlier than the rest of the world to do all of the medications and treatments that keep me alive.  I wouldn’t be told that my cough sounds terrible by strangers, and be slowly moved away from by people when I cough.  I wouldn’t have to explain to potential employers, friends, boyfriends and strangers why I am sick, and what my life expectancy is.

But if I were normal, I wouldn’t be me. 

I wouldn’t have to rely on God for every breath I take.  I wouldn’t have the same drive to make a difference in the research of CF.  I wouldn’t know how precious time really is, and try to make the most of it.  I wouldn’t be as conscious of what’s really important.

It’s changed me, CF.
It’s made me tougher.
Stronger.
A fighter.
A survivor. 

And it’s made me fully dependent on the One who made me, who knows me, and who loves me despite my many flaws.

I may never be prettier, skinnier, be a bestselling author or a famous singer.  And I will never be normal.

But I will always be a child of the King.

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