Hindsight

By Kristen Entwistle

I was walking around my undergraduate alma mater a few months ago. I was there for my sister’s graduation, but I took a few minutes to walk around my old science building. As I walked the near-hallowed halls of Ken Olsen Science Center, I was overcome by how far removed I feel from a place that used to feel so much like home. How many changes have occurred since I graduated three years ago – both in faculty and staff as well as the infrastructure of the building.

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As I walked around, I remembered first classes and last classes. Beloved professors and presidents. Botched labs and failed tests. Successful research and fond memories of classes. The cold days and the hard days, the warm days and the easy days.

I’m in the middle of graduate school right now, and it’s amazing to look back and see where I’ve been. It’s hard to believe that three years ago I was graduating on this very lawn. That I had no idea what lie ahead for me, except where I was attending graduate school. I did not know what God had in store for me, and looking back now, I could not have ever guessed that I would be where I am right now: working in a lab on the disease that I have, funded by a group of parents of kids with CF, part of an amazing church where I can serve and grow and love people, where I have the opportunity to babysit some wonderful kids who I can honestly say I love with all of my heart, where a place I knew nothing of and knew no one could feel so much like a home.

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It’s true. I’ve lost much, struggled, been frustrated and beaten down in these last three years. I’ve had PICC lines and more antibiotics than I can count, but I’ve come out swinging on the other side. But I’ve also seen God do some amazing things with what I’ve been given and where I’ve been. I have seen him use my CF to change people’s hearts and lives. I have seen God use me in ways I never thought possible – leading a Bible study and leading worship from the piano. He’s provided me with friends who lift me up and encourage me, challenge me and love me. He’s blessed me with so much.

I never saw any of that coming three years ago. All I saw was the great unknown, the strange state of Michigan and the weird mascot of my school – the Spartan. The headache of changing doctors and hospitals and the anxiety of living on my own. I was heartbroken to leave the place where I had grown so much, devastated to leave a church that I had come to love, people I had grown to love as well. I couldn’t see past the here and now, couldn’t see that even as I was leaving a place I knew so well and loved, God had great things planned. He was going before me, preparing a place for me even then. And he was preparing me.

Even now, when the future is unknown and I’m not sure how God is going to work things out, I can trust that He is faithful and that He will go with me, wherever I go. Hindsight may be 20/20, but God’s vision is always 20/20. So no matter what you’re going through right now, no matter what unknown you’re facing, trust in the One who can see it all, who’s got you in His hands, and who will never fail you. His sight is better than hindsight.

13 thoughts on “Hindsight

  1. How amazing that only 3 years has passed but you feel so removed. God will lead you to many places. I was born and raised in California (figured I would die there because I loved it so much) but God had different plans – He introduced me to my Canadian husband. Now, I live in Canada – where summer is only two weeks long haha, but I am blessed. Enjoy your journey through life where ever God may lead you 🙂

  2. “Hindsight may be 20/20, but God’s vision is always 20/20.” LOVE that and love your attitude about your struggles (though I’m sure it took time to get there).

    Last week I took my children by my alma mater, though it’s been several years longer for me. The town and the campus have both grown and changed so much in that time. Thankfully, I’ve grown too. Thank you for sharing your story and reminding me that God’s vision is perfect.

  3. Visiting from Christian Women Bloggers Facebook page! What a wonderful blog, you offer much perspective on endings and beginnings,the past and how God shapes the present, how life changes according to Gods plan. Encouraging! I find when we trust in God, he shapes our futures in amazing ways, better than we imagined!

  4. Visiting from Christian Women Blogger’s Facebook page.. Wonderful post! You illustrates through your story just how good God is, how endings are really new beginnings, and how God uses us for good, paves the road for us ahead when we abide in His love! Thank you! Encouraging!

  5. Hindsight is my killer… Thank you for the timely reminder that my vision of what I could have done isn’t half as important as the vision that God has for me. – Jerusha, TheDisneyChef.com

  6. Amen. God’s vision for our lives is much better than our own, even though while living through the seasons of the unknown is painful, God will show His presence in our lives to let us know He is still there. He is working things out for us. Be blessed.

  7. This is why I love keeping journals… I often forget just how much God has done in my life… Where he’s lead me away… Love remembering His power in my life

    Marissa

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